The mentality to own a person in an intimate relationship, is one of the biggest reasons for distress. The moment one gets married, that ownership reaches another level. Why in the world would one want to own a person as if he/she is a thing. One can only own things but never a person.
With ownership comes control. And whenever there is control there is friction. Neither ownership, nor friction can let a relationship flourish. Both stem from severe insecurities. When a person is insecure about one’s partner, there is an urge to cling on to them. This clinging leads to a tendency to own a person.
No amount of ownership or control can ever drive away insecurities. The only way to deal with them would be communicating the same to one’s partner. Again, insecurities can come from both ends. Talking about it always help. But if one person is prone to feeling insecure at the drop of a hat with the slightest trigger, there is something wrong with that person. One needs to seek help to deal with an insecure mind.
So many relationships are infested with insecurities. It takes a huge toll on the partners involved and their relationship. The moment the insecure mind is satiated with an explanation to get rid of it, another trigger would raise its dirty head to breed more insecurity. There is no end to it if it has become an intrinsic part of a person’s nature.
To put up with a partner who is always insecure can be mentally daunting. Though they underestimate the impact it has on their persona, not much is done about it. Relationships often break because of insecurity but marriages seldom break because of it. Ironic and how!
It’s not worth getting insecure and its not worth putting up with insecurities. Change yourself or change the situation. Its too big a price to pay to stay in any relationship. Secure your relationship by driving away your insecurities.