Now and never or now and forever…

Very often people come to me – confused. They aren’t sure if they are in love or infatuated. Although there is a very thin line between the two – INITIALLY, one can always tell the difference. These beautiful feelings may overlap the two conditions but there are pronounced stark differences.

The first thing I ask my clients as to what do they think? As much as for most of the people love is the answer (it’s more out of wishful thinking rather than the reality), in their heart of hearts they do doubt their own feelings. There is this constant question looming about the hypothetical condition of infatuation.

Infatuation is a condition in which a person is instantly drawn to another person and this is generally short lived. There is an instant withdrawal as well. Behaviour follows very extreme patterns of intensity. The magnitude of feelings is very strong at both the ends. Too good to be true is how I would put it. When one cannot accept this unrealistic reality, it’s a big pointer that something is amiss.

So the next important aspect to be focussed upon is the duration of the association. Extremely short period of having known someone and still falling for him/her is the biggest sign of infatuation. One doesn’t know the opposite person well and yet one is smitten – big time. This can lead to two eventualities – either instantly falling out of love or falling deeper into love when the reality sets in. It’s either in or out. Men are more prone to infatuation (thanks to their different wiring) compared to women.

Again infatuation is normally restricted to a person’s physical attributes with a high need for physical intimacy. Once this stage is outdone, the attraction goes down. On the other hand, love is never dependent on a few parameters. There is a plethora of amazing experiences to be experienced and enjoyed. It’s more about the journey than the destination. The list of attractions is endless.

Before committing yourself into any relationship, please find out if your attraction has a shelf life or it is for long (if not ever). Both beautiful feelings though. The choice is yours – now and never or now and forever….