From the time a couple gets married, there is always a probability (high or low) of a divorce. No marriage is ever divorce proof. But one can work towards making it one. The big question is how! Before coming to the answer of this big question, let us focus on the distorted thinking that couples commonly adopt to when in a marriage. Such thinking can certainly hinder one’s relationship.
- Couples don’t realize that a marriage/relationship is like a ticking bomb. If they don’t work towards it, it can be dangerous.
- Some hope it would automatically get better with time.
- Some presume it is getting better without actually being aware of the partner’s actual or real feelings towards them.
- Some are aware of the problems they face, but are not clear on the intensity of it.
- A few become complacent and learn to live with it. They get too used to the familiarity to trade it off for anything else.
- Some partners continuously play the blame game – be it with their partner, themselves, children, circumstance, health etc.
A relationship is one of the highest indicators of happiness. And when the going is good, it can be a huge source of pleasure. But when it starts getting inflicted with conflicts, of which couples have no clue as to how to deal with it, can become painful. Some suffer quietly, while others are vocal about it. When this suffering continues over a period of time, it can drain one emotionally.
All relationships have a great start, but end up in the same place. A beautiful common past of love and passion doesn’t guarantee permanence of these feelings. The biggest fallacy most couples make is concentrate only on remaining married. This standalone goal cannot be achieved by itself. But striving towards feeling passionate, alive and free in one’s marriage is what makes it work. It is an ideal marriage when one can be one’s self. It is also healthy to expect problems in a relationship. And these problems are simply the indicators that some changes are needed. Once couples have the necessary tools and skills of how to become a team and solve problems together, everything can be dealt with effectively for life. It’s just about the right approach.
After all the major cause of a divorce may be a marriage, but there are reasons galore for a marriage – the odds are one against many. All probability of a marriage winning hands down!!!!