Corona driven times have erased the difference between weekends and weekdays. But Sundays haven’t lost their charm. They bring along a sense of calm and peace to rewind and rejuvenate. While I was enjoying every bit of my favourite day, I heard some very disturbing news regarding one of my favourite actors – “Sushant Singh Rajput is dead.” I wanted to tell myself, they were confusing his secretary’s death to his. My next reaction was the presumption that maybe corona took away his life, but when I found out the actual reason for his death, I was shell shocked. This write up is a feeble attempt to comprehend and accept the fact that one of the fine actors of the film industry is no more with us. I want to get rid of my overwhelming numbness haunting my mind with several thoughts asking me, why would such a successful young actor take his own life?
Reports say he was under medication for depression. Why was he depressed? Was he financially strained, was he struggling with his intimate relationship or was the uncertainty about his profession that caught him in the web of anxiety? Success, money, fame have nothing to do with a balanced mind. There are many people who are neither successful nor moneyed but are happy. And there are people with fame and money, yet unhappy. This totally discards the premise that materialistic gains promise happiness or mental wellness.
Was Sushant Singh Rajput lonely? Having three siblings, many friends and an intimate relationship would never put someone on the threshold of loneliness. Then, what made him commit suicide? Speculations will be rife about his mental state that drove him to take the extreme step. We probably will never know the correct reason. But my heart goes out to all the people who are in depression or on the brink of it. I would like to say with all my conviction that a lack of meaningful relationship will make you perceive your life as meaningless. Just because one has many friends or siblings doesn’t mean one cannot feel isolated. Every human being needs the right support system to support oneself. The right set of people make difficult times relatively easier to get through. But do you know, happiness also needs support? Celebrations are incomplete, rather impossible without the presence of people you are close to.
Relatives and friends are always there but it’s difficult to fall back upon them and vice-versa. You can’t be close to all your friends and relatives either. But having at least that one person whom you can speak to, about anything and everything without the fear of being judged is what makes your relationship with that person valuable. And as a result, your life invaluable. It can be your parent, partner, sibling, or a relative. But if for some reason if you can’t have that confidence and comfort to confide or counsel, you need that person. A genuine friendship/relationship, not necessarily intimate can be the biggest coping mechanism and defence mechanism against anything and everything. With a dearth of people who are not honest and straight forward, finding someone who is not critical, manipulative and jealous is difficult. But if you are true to yourself and true in your conduct, you will find that kind of genuineness. Don’t be in a hurry to find that person. Such relationships do not develop overnight. Time will help you find that special someone, who can make your life special.
Many people would look down upon someone’s friendship to an opposite gender, especially if not single. But the friendship you share should be open and transparent, that your conscience would make you proud of it and your partner would never question it.
When death toll from corona is reaching new peaks every day and any death reported is correlated with the pandemic, seeing the rise in the number of suicides is unnerving. please ask your self if you have the capability to deal with any eventuality? Do you have someone who makes you feel good when not feeling good? My last word of advice would be ‘never be a go-to person for someone who is not your go-to person. But that apart, depression is temporary. Don’t let it take away your life permanently.