About a decade ago, it used to be considered very normal to share everything with one’s partner. A universal given, ‘loving is sharing’. Maybe, it remains the same even today, except for only one difference – inability to share one’s phone with one’s partner. There is no dearth of suspicious people wanting to spy on their partner’s phone and enough compulsive users obsessed with deleting their phone history all the time. One of the major causes of couples having tumultuous relationship is unfortunately the mobile phone and the toll it has taken on their trust.
Why has it become responsible for so much friction between two people intimately involved? Why does it cause so many breakups? Whom do we blame – the spying partner or the partner with inseparable phone? The answer to this will probably always remain debatable. How does one justify the need to check on one’s partner’s phone? Why can’t one show his/her phone to the curious partner and satiate curiosity? Two different perspectives work here. First and foremost, the fact that one doesn’t want to share the phone with one’s partner conveys something amiss and hence the reluctance. Secondly, sometimes nothing could be wrong at all, but sheer discomfort to share one’s phone – an infringement upon one’s personal zone, considered by many.
There is nothing wrong in not wanting to share one’s phone with the other. Every individual is entitled to his/her private and personal space. Any encroachment on the same can add a negative tone to the relationship. Something not shared or brought into the open doesn’t always spell trouble. Suspicious partners have to put their doubts to rest in order to work out their relationship. A newly dating couple almost were on the verge of calling off their relationship only because the woman insisted on literally checking on her partner’s phone, much to his annoyance. In this day and age when smart phones act as mini computers, information stored in it can be pretty extensive, ranging from one’s personal data to one’s work related material etc. A scepticism well understandable.
But, what about individuals who are actually cheating on their partners through this mode of communication? Infidelity has many forms including emotional. One doesn’t have to be physically intimate with another to cause emotional infidelity in their existing relationship. And this infidelity can harm a relationship if flecked with addiction, compulsion and dependence with the other person involved.
Regardless of whether a person is involved with someone else through this medium or not, mobile phones have become addictions and people afflicted by this disorder certainly need therapy to wean themselves off. It’s a common sight in restaurants and many other public places where couples are physically together but with their eyes locked on their respective cell phones. Why not look into each other’s eyes instead of looking at the phone screens and avoid the inability to see eye to eye? It’s a marker couples should realize and recognize; an index of their future relationship – please don’t let your cell phone turn into a ‘touch me not’ plant!!!